A former assistant’s stripper-girlfriend’s monkey bites a child

[Ledsteplin]

Crazy story for sure. Just curious......am I the only one on TideFans that had a pet monkey as a kid? True story.

My cousin got a squirrel monkey back in the 60s in Panama City Beach. I hated that thing. He was too rambunctious, creating havoc.

 

[rolltide_21]

How a monkey belonging to Jeff Banks' girlfriend became a viral story during 'Monday Night Football' | Sporting News

www.sportingnews.com

If the title is improper, I apologize. But I really didn’t know how to summarize it in a sentence.

The coach is Jeff Banks, who went to Texas with Sark. Apparently he left his wife for a woman whose stage name is Pole Assassin and the monkey is part of her act. He played at Washington State for Mike Price. (Not making that up).

According to Pole, she was hosting a neighborhood Halloween party when a child went up to the monkey’s cage, ignoring signs to stay away, when he got bit. The bite required medical attention.

There is a picture on Twitter of Pole standing on a rug with the Alabama logo. She is wearing clothes in the picture.

That’s the best summary I’ve seen yet

What a weird story.

 

[rolltide_21]

Pole Assassin- an appropriate nickname for kickers under Jeff Banks not named Will Reichard. They loved them some uprights

 

[Chukker Veteran]

When I was in school back in the early seventies there was a guy who lived there with a pet monkey. He had trained it to roll cigarettes. It was very good at it.

 

[crimsonaudio]

When I was in school back in the early seventies there was a guy who lived there with a pet monkey. He had trained it to roll cigarettes. It was very good at it.

"Cigarettes"

Right.

 

[uafan4life]

Crazy story for sure. Just curious......am I the only one on TideFans that had a pet monkey as a kid? True story.

I never had one but I wanted one - thanks to Indiana Jones! :-D

 

[BamaDMD]

I can't be the only one who saw the thread title and thought, "what has LSU and Orgeron done now?"

Right?

No, but I first thought it said "A former assistant’s stripper-girlfriend’s monkey's Uncle bites a child".

Now THAT would be bizarre....

 

[CB4]

Let’s see what Tim Brando (@selmaborntidefan all time favorite) has to say:

 

[Relayer]

My girlfriend's, uh... monkey... kinda snapped at me one time.

 

[Perrett4Bama]

I cannot wait for Rick and Bubba to get ahold of this one ..... Monkey, stripper, Texas, Mike Price, Halloween, Pole Assassin.....

 

[JayBama_in_PCOLA]

Being a special teams coach, Jeff should know something about out kicking his coverage.

View attachment 20262

With all that witchcraft on, are we sure he did?

 

[Tideflyer]

Could this be SEC Shorts finest hour??

 

[Leeroy]

Well, I guess we know why he left to go to Austin. I don’t think Pole Assassins can work in Tuscaloosa…legally anyway. New stage name coming…Monkey Mama is my guess.

 

[TitleWave]

If you'da told me a Texas football coach hadda hooked up with a Pole Assassin, I'da figurred he musta met the ol' Urban Cowboy hisself in a leather bar - NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT...

 

[CrimsonNagus]

Listening to the Pole Assassin’s video on AL.com describing the incident, I would hazard to guess she is “a few fries short of a Happy Meal”.

Maybe but, she does come with a toy.

 

[Bama_N_Va]

So a Texas special teams coach, a stripper and attack monkey walk into a bar…

And some old guy at the bar is yelling "If Colt doesn't get hurt...".

 

[BamaFossil]

Crazy story for sure. Just curious......am I the only one on TideFans that had a pet monkey as a kid? True story.

My grandparents had a pet monkey on their farm. Always getting into mischief. One day the dog ate him.

 

[CrimsonTheory]

Did they reboot Jerry Springer and I miss the news somehow?

I can't wait until we find out the monkey was simply a costume worn by her sister.

 

[Ole Man Dan]

No comment.
I didn't go with my first thought's.

 

[Ole Man Dan]

Can you pinch a monkey’s nose to get it to open it’s mouth?

You can pinch a Monkeys nose, but I'll bet you get bit.