Tips for a Happy Marriage:
1.Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage,
then comes the good food and companionship. She goes onTuesdays, I go on Fridays.
2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in Atlanta and mine is in Memphis.
3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen.
5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster, and electric bread maker. Then she said, "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.
7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was, she told me, "In the Lake."
8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!"
10. Remember... Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
11. Statistically, 100% of all divorces start with marriage.
12. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
13. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.
14. The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"
Seriously, at the wedding - don't blink. The ceremony and reception will be over before you open your eyes again. My wedding now seems like a blur. But the last 8 years have been the best of my life!
RTR
:biga2: